7 tips on how to build self confidence and ask for what you want

Sep 21, 2011 by DianeCorriette

Some women find asking for what they want really difficult. I know I was one of them. I would hint at what I want to not ask for what I want and hope someone can guess. Or I would say things like “it’s cold in here isn’t it” when what I really wanted to ask was “can you shut the window please”.

It is frustrating not being able to ask for what you want and there are a series of things I did to help me overcome my inability to ask and really go out there and just tell people exactly what it is I want every time. I have shared what those things are in this eBook

“51 tips on how to ask for what you want and get it every time!“

Click the link to get hold of your own copy. In the meantime I thought I would share 10 tips on how to build self confidence and ask for what you want. Nothing is more empowering than being able to ask – whether you receive a YES or a NO. It is the inability to even ask that is the most frustrating thing of all. These are all tips taken directly from the eBook that I am sharing below:

Tip 3

Think about why you hate asking. You need to identify why the thought of asking fills you with dread. Write down some of the reasons you hate to ask. Is it because you hate the thought of rejection? See tip 4!

Tip 9
Stay confident. It is easy to pick up on someone who is not confident by their voice and their body language so stay confident when you ask. A shaky voice, your head bowed, fidgeting and asking in a low voice are all signs of you not being confident about what you want.

Tip 14
Control your “already know the answer” thinking. Sometimes we believe we already know what is going to happen. We already know that this person will say NO or that they won’t want to help you. Stop trying to second guess what people will/will not do because you never know until it happens.

Tip 19

Never give up! If you are asking for something and someone says no ask them if there is a particular reason for their no. If they are just saying “No, not right now” then ask for their permission to ask them again at a later date and keep asking until they say yes or until they scream at you to leave them alone.

Tip 26
Ask yourself why you can’t ask. It’s the easiest thing in the world to do. Before you go to bed and when you wake up in the morning just ask “Why do I find asking for what I want so difficult?” and allow your mind to provide you with the answer.

Tip 32
Build your network. Spend time building your personal and professional networks so that when you have to ask for someone you have different people you can approach. That way if one says no you can go ahead and ask another.

Tip 49
Take responsibility for your results. If you didn’t get the answer you wanted take a look at what you said and how. Did you get your meaning across or was there anything you could have done differently? If you didn’t get the result you wanted don’t blame the other person but instead empower yourself by taking responsibility for it and look at what the cause might have been.

You can get your own copy of 51 ways to ask for what you want <== click the link

About Diane Corriette

I write on this self development blog about building self confidence, and living a life of full self expression where you are free to be you. Being able to be confident is not so much about how you think but what you feel. To successfully build self confidence you must use your thoughts to create an image of who you want to be, and your emotions to help you feel this amazing new you and then visualise & focus on it until it becomes your reality.