Comments on: The new excitement of a personal relationship http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/ Opening The Door To A More Confident You Tue, 07 Feb 2012 15:45:43 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Dori http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-232 Dori Thu, 23 Oct 2008 13:26:18 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-232 Hey Diane, Congratulations on your new relationship! As for advice., I don't know if I have any, but..well, let's just say that this is my insight that I've gained so far in my relationship. I have been married only two and a half years, but I've known my hubby for six years and the great majority of that time before we were married was a long-distance relationship across the Atlantic from each other :) What I learned from the beginning was patience in this relationship. Many times I just wanted us to be together right then and I wanted us to be at some undetermined point down the road already. Well the distance and governmental red tape help me learn to be patient and to take our growing relationship one day at a time and I'm glad it did. We grew stronger and closer because we knew we had found who we wanted to be with and we were willing to do anything to be together. So now that we are married and able to be together, that patience comes in handy, especially when I have to ask him to do something fifty times. LOL. We are in it for the duration and I hope it can be like Goldie and Kurt and last and last and last :) Hey Diane,
Congratulations on your new relationship!

As for advice., I don’t know if I have any, but..well, let’s just say that this is my insight that I’ve gained so far in my relationship. I have been married only two and a half years, but I’ve known my hubby for six years and the great majority of that time before we were married was a long-distance relationship across the Atlantic from each other :) What I learned from the beginning was patience in this relationship. Many times I just wanted us to be together right then and I wanted us to be at some undetermined point down the road already. Well the distance and governmental red tape help me learn to be patient and to take our growing relationship one day at a time and I’m glad it did. We grew stronger and closer because we knew we had found who we wanted to be with and we were willing to do anything to be together.

So now that we are married and able to be together, that patience comes in handy, especially when I have to ask him to do something fifty times. LOL. We are in it for the duration and I hope it can be like Goldie and Kurt and last and last and last :)

]]> By: DianeCorriette http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-222 DianeCorriette Sat, 18 Oct 2008 18:15:03 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-222 Randa - thanks for sharing. It was thanks to Randa that I created this blog post after the two of us had a skype conversation about being in love! Bonnie - crazy as ever.... that was funny! Iwona it's great to meet you on here at least. Thank you for powerfully sharing about your relationship with Dre. I love that you hate to be apart :) Randa – thanks for sharing.

It was thanks to Randa that I created this blog post after the two of us had a skype conversation about being in love!

Bonnie – crazy as ever…. that was funny!

Iwona it’s great to meet you on here at least. Thank you for powerfully sharing about your relationship with Dre. I love that you hate to be apart :)

]]> By: iwona walerys http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-219 iwona walerys Fri, 17 Oct 2008 15:26:39 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-219 Hi Diane, Congratulations on the new relationship and especially on the new feeling of excitement :) I met Dre when I was 21 and he was 55, I never felt any age difference between us at all but he does have more life experience. I am not naive, he is not taking advantage of me. My mum is 1 year younger than my partner and I LOVE IT, she doesn't and that was enough to let the family go. Dre and I is my priority no matter what is going on outside of US. We work together every day and help each other to surrender to the real US. It has always been very effortless to create romance every day, to see each other as friends first, to respect the differences, to work through issues, to see Dre in Dre and to celebrate our love that grows deeper and deeper every day. The challenge for me lies in controlling the ego and the mind as they like to have their way but that's not hard neither. At the end of the day we don't need words to communicate, our souls do the work! We are ALWAYS together and we hate being apart and I've had this feeling since day 1. We're like two kids that can't ever get enough of each other and our hearts are fluttering. The new excitement feeling is always in the air as there is always something new to discover about us ! hope to meet you soon too love, iwona. Hi Diane,

Congratulations on the new relationship and especially on the new feeling of excitement :)

I met Dre when I was 21 and he was 55, I never felt any age difference between us at all but he does have more life experience. I am not naive, he is not taking advantage of me.
My mum is 1 year younger than my partner and I LOVE IT, she doesn’t and that was enough to let the family go.
Dre and I is my priority no matter what is going on outside of US. We work together every day and help each other to surrender to the real US. It has always been very effortless to create romance every day, to see each other as friends first, to respect the differences, to work through issues, to see Dre in Dre and to celebrate our love that grows deeper and deeper every day.
The challenge for me lies in controlling the ego and the mind as they like to have their way but that’s not hard neither. At the end of the day we don’t need words to communicate, our souls do the work!
We are ALWAYS together and we hate being apart and I’ve had this feeling since day 1. We’re like two kids that can’t ever get enough of each other and our hearts are fluttering.
The new excitement feeling is always in the air as there is always something new to discover about us !

hope to meet you soon too

love, iwona.

]]> By: Bonnie Boots http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-218 Bonnie Boots Fri, 17 Oct 2008 14:26:42 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-218 I’ve been in a tumultuous relationship for—well, I can’t count the years. At first it was all so new and exciting. Oh, how my heart would race when we were together! I felt so alone and unconnected when we were apart, so I began rising earlier in the morning, skipping sleep at night so we could spend more time together. Every day was an adventure, learning new things, playing games, having fun. But that euphoria didn’t last long. As time went on, the relationship became more and more work. I found the time we spent together required more effort, took more patience. It seemed every day there was a new issue to work through. Many times I came to the breaking point and wanted to throw in the towel, but promises were made..”I’ll make it better!”…so I stayed, hoping this time it really would get better. But it was lies, all lies. Today, I no longer have hope. I know things will never get better. There will never be an end to the issues. Nothing ever really gets fixed, just patched up till the next blowout. And yet I stay—perhaps because I have so much invested. All I know is, if I had life to live over, I would never get involved with Windows. I’d go straight to Mac. Bonnie Boots invites you to join her in her love/hate relationship with the internet at http://www.theinternetwizards.com I’ve been in a tumultuous relationship for—well, I can’t count the years. At first it was all so new and exciting. Oh, how my heart would race when we were together! I felt so alone and unconnected when we were apart, so I began rising earlier in the morning, skipping sleep at night so we could spend more time together. Every day was an adventure, learning new things, playing games, having fun.

But that euphoria didn’t last long. As time went on, the relationship became more and more work. I found the time we spent together required more effort, took more patience. It seemed every day there was a new issue to work through. Many times I came to the breaking point and wanted to throw in the towel, but promises were made..”I’ll make it better!”…so I stayed, hoping this time it really would get better.

But it was lies, all lies.

Today, I no longer have hope. I know things will never get better. There will never be an end to the issues. Nothing ever really gets fixed, just patched up till the next blowout. And yet I stay—perhaps because I have so much invested. All I know is, if I had life to live over, I would never get involved with Windows. I’d go straight to Mac.

Bonnie Boots invites you to join her in her love/hate relationship with the internet at http://www.theinternetwizards.com

]]> By: Randa http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-217 Randa Fri, 17 Oct 2008 12:10:37 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-217 I have been with my partner for 14 years and there is still fire. The attraction is still strong for both of us - both mentally and physically. We are both so busy that we almost need to schedule in that special time. Intimacy is important .. and I don't mean just sex - but being close.. I believe communication is the key. I can share just about everything I am feeling.. and I have been more honest than with any previous partner - I feel no guilt and I have no major secrets.. it is all out there and I am incredibly comfortable with this. We both feel enormous respect for one-another. We share similar (almost identical) values. My partner is kind, sensitive, thoughtful and compassionate and wouldn't hurt a fly (and adores animals). I love that. i don't particularly like the term "soul mates" but there is something different for me here - I have never lost interest. Sure, it is natural to feel attraction for others and we say that's OK - I just don't want to know about it in detail but to know that it's OK makes it easier. Also, we have gone through so much with one-another that attractions are fleeting - there is too much to lose now. It hasn't all been easy - there has been awful times but we have got through each one and have become stronger in our partnership. We are a team. But there has never infidelity .. I respect my partner too much. I could never have an affair and lie about it. Randa I have been with my partner for 14 years and there is still fire. The attraction is still strong for both of us – both mentally and physically. We are both so busy that we almost need to schedule in that special time. Intimacy is important .. and I don’t mean just sex – but being close..

I believe communication is the key. I can share just about everything I am feeling.. and I have been more honest than with any previous partner – I feel no guilt and I have no major secrets.. it is all out there and I am incredibly comfortable with this.

We both feel enormous respect for one-another. We share similar (almost identical) values. My partner is kind, sensitive, thoughtful and compassionate and wouldn’t hurt a fly (and adores animals). I love that. i don’t particularly like the term “soul mates” but there is something different for me here – I have never lost interest.

Sure, it is natural to feel attraction for others and we say that’s OK – I just don’t want to know about it in detail but to know that it’s OK makes it easier. Also, we have gone through so much with one-another that attractions are fleeting – there is too much to lose now.

It hasn’t all been easy – there has been awful times but we have got through each one and have become stronger in our partnership. We are a team. But there has never infidelity .. I respect my partner too much. I could never have an affair and lie about it.

Randa

]]> By: Diane Corriette http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-215 Diane Corriette Fri, 17 Oct 2008 11:59:14 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-215 Orval I love your acronym - thank you for sharing that with us and Deana you too talked about respect and honesty being important - that has definitely shone through. Jan your story is amazing. At 15 many people will say you dont know what you want but you've obviously proved them wrong! Shelagh thank you for sharing that. Its exactly how it was for me. I walked in and met him and there was a connection that I still can't explain! Ultimately the only moment is now and that's what I intend to enjoy and I'll you let you know what happens 20 years from now :) My thanks to you all for your heartfelt comments stay blessed Diane Orval I love your acronym – thank you for sharing that with us and Deana you too talked about respect and honesty being important – that has definitely shone through.

Jan your story is amazing. At 15 many people will say you dont know what you want but you’ve obviously proved them wrong!

Shelagh thank you for sharing that. Its exactly how it was for me. I walked in and met him and there was a connection that I still can’t explain!

Ultimately the only moment is now and that’s what I intend to enjoy and I’ll you let you know what happens 20 years from now :)

My thanks to you all for your heartfelt comments

stay blessed
Diane

]]> By: Shelagh http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-214 Shelagh Fri, 17 Oct 2008 05:30:02 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-214 23 years ago, I met T. He exploded into my life, and I felt a connection I had not felt in all my 40 years. When we started sharing a home, I was adamant I would not marry - this incredible feeling just could not last, it felt far too precious and somehow delicate. Each day I marvelled at how my heart jumped when he walked into the room. Surely this was teenager stuff, not serious, getting married stuff. So I settled for enjoying each day, and not worrying too much about how long we would be so enchanted with each other. Then he asked me to marry him. And something shifted. I suddenly just knew that I wanted to grow old with him. The moment of our marriage vows was the most intense of my life. That was 20 years ago; a huge amount has happened since then, and our differences have been tested. We've both changed - me more than him. But yesterday he supported me through a difficult dental procedure, wrapped me with love and his big strong arms, cuddled e to sleep in bed - and I knew that love, that attraction, that connection, that so long ago seemed so delicate and fragile, is now strong and flexible like the threads in a spider's web. This is what happened for me, Diane. (and, as a recovering control freak, it still amazes me that , in this most important decision, and long before I knew about "letting go", I did just that!) 23 years ago, I met T. He exploded into my life, and I felt a connection I had not felt in all my 40 years.
When we started sharing a home, I was adamant I would not marry – this incredible feeling just could not last, it felt far too precious and somehow delicate.
Each day I marvelled at how my heart jumped when he walked into the room. Surely this was teenager stuff, not serious, getting married stuff.
So I settled for enjoying each day, and not worrying too much about how long we would be so enchanted with each other.
Then he asked me to marry him. And something shifted.
I suddenly just knew that I wanted to grow old with him.
The moment of our marriage vows was the most intense of my life.
That was 20 years ago; a huge amount has happened since then, and our differences have been tested. We’ve both changed – me more than him.
But yesterday he supported me through a difficult dental procedure, wrapped me with love and his big strong arms, cuddled e to sleep in bed – and I knew that love, that attraction, that connection, that so long ago seemed so delicate and fragile, is now strong and flexible like the threads in a spider’s web.
This is what happened for me, Diane. (and, as a recovering control freak, it still amazes me that , in this most important decision, and long before I knew about “letting go”, I did just that!)

]]> By: Jan Owbridge http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-211 Jan Owbridge Thu, 16 Oct 2008 22:52:07 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-211 Alan and I met when I was 15 and he was 23. Everyone said it would never last. But we made a COMMITMENT to each other. We decided that the relationship is more important than the argument;mthat our relationship was first priority above the kids (they would grow up and leave and we would still be there) and we realised that everything worth having is worth fighting for. We celebrate 40 years in March. We have two kids and two grandkids and after 25 years we did it all again (we always said if we felt the same about each other after 25 years we would!) - actually it is even better. We work together, too. So we are together more than we are apart. Is it always easy? No. But is it worth it? Definitely! Alan and I met when I was 15 and he was 23. Everyone said it would never last. But we made a COMMITMENT to each other. We decided that the relationship is more important than the argument;mthat our relationship was first priority above the kids (they would grow up and leave and we would still be there) and we realised that everything worth having is worth fighting for.
We celebrate 40 years in March. We have two kids and two grandkids and after 25 years we did it all again (we always said if we felt the same about each other after 25 years we would!) – actually it is even better. We work together, too. So we are together more than we are apart.
Is it always easy? No. But is it worth it? Definitely!

]]> By: Deana Wilmink-Martina http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-210 Deana Wilmink-Martina Thu, 16 Oct 2008 21:32:03 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-210 Hi Diane, My advise to you is simple, enyoy the moment and since you already know what you want, believe me, it will work. Please don't make the mistake and think that you "must" always cook what he wants because you now want to do that. Remember you cannot change others. Don't try to do that either. Respect each other and keep being authentic. Be honest and respect each other's thinking even when it happens to be different than what you would have want it to be . Have confidence in each other and you will live a harmonius life together. I met my partner 21 years ago when I just turned 39 and in less than a year our first son was born and within two years we had two sons. They are now 20 and 18 years old now. The things I mentioned are the kind of formula we manage to keep a healthy relationship on. Now we are prepairing to soon live our life without having our children around us in the same house and we talk to each other whenever we have the time to relax and have a glas of wine and talk about our selves and our plan for the future. Other than this in between we live and enjoy life and give each other the space to be yourself and keep your own friends and do other things on your own too. I mean not all my friends are my husbands friends. I don't let his feelings about somebody determine my friendship with that person. My own feeling counts for me. I don't expect his aproval to everything I want to do. And the same counts the other way around. Ok Diane, These are my advices to you. Just enjoy the nice feelings you have now and don't worry to much about how things will go later.You know what you want. EnJoy life NOW!!!!!!! Hi Diane,

My advise to you is simple, enyoy the moment and since you already know what you want, believe me, it will work.

Please don’t make the mistake and think that you “must” always cook what he wants because you now want to do that.

Remember you cannot change others. Don’t try to do that either. Respect each other and keep being authentic.

Be honest and respect each other’s thinking even when it happens to be different than what you would have want it to be . Have confidence in each other and you will live a harmonius life together.

I met my partner 21 years ago when I just turned 39 and in less than a year our first son was born and within two years we had two sons. They are now 20 and 18 years old now.

The things I mentioned are the kind of formula we manage to keep a healthy relationship on. Now we are prepairing to soon live our life without having our children around us in the same house and we talk to each other whenever we have the time to relax and have a glas of wine and talk about our selves and our plan for the future.

Other than this in between we live and enjoy life and give each other the space to be yourself and keep your own friends and do other things on your own too.
I mean not all my friends are my husbands friends. I don’t let his feelings about somebody determine my friendship with that person. My own feeling counts for me. I don’t expect his aproval to everything I want to do. And the same counts the other way around.

Ok Diane, These are my advices to you. Just enjoy the nice feelings you have now and don’t worry to much about how things will go later.You know what you want. EnJoy life NOW!!!!!!!

]]> By: Orval http://inspirationalguidance.com/the-new-excitement-of-a-personal-relationship/comment-page-1/#comment-209 Orval Thu, 16 Oct 2008 21:23:41 +0000 http://inspirationalguidance.com/?p=708#comment-209 When a relationship is brand new, it easy and natural to feel elation, euphoria and stimulation. Because it's new and our expectations are hjgh and our optimism is through the roof. After a while, the warts start coming out. They can steal the intensity of those feelings. That might take one date or it might take a few years. But it will happen. Recognizing that this will happen gives us an edge up. We can take steps to manage the warts. I have been happily partnered with a beautiful, intelligent woman for 7 years. We are getting legally married next month and we expect to spend our remaining days together. We also expect that we will have differing views (she's a Democrat and I'm not for example) Our relationship is built on RESPECT. Physical relations are wonderful. Social relations are great. Family relations are pretty good. But RESPECT is the key to any relationship and to it's longivety. The standard definition of respect holds but it is also an acronym: Religious presence and compatibility Expectations - reviewing and keeping real Specify your needs, your desires, your expectations and your no no's Perform - work your plan and work this acronym every day Emotions - watch and manage with respect for one another Communication - during the day every day (talking and listening!) Trust - the key to any successful relation Each of these has a lot of work behind them - a lot of knowledge to achieve a long lasting relationship. And it is worth every single minute spent working it and enjoying it. I wish you the very best that God has in store for you. When a relationship is brand new, it easy and natural to feel elation, euphoria and stimulation. Because it’s new and our expectations are hjgh and our optimism is through the roof.

After a while, the warts start coming out. They can steal the intensity of those feelings. That might take one date or it might take a few years. But it will happen.

Recognizing that this will happen gives us an edge up. We can take steps to manage the warts.

I have been happily partnered with a beautiful, intelligent woman for 7 years. We are getting legally married next month and we expect to spend our remaining days together. We also expect that we will have differing views (she’s a Democrat and I’m not for example)

Our relationship is built on RESPECT. Physical relations are wonderful. Social relations are great. Family relations are pretty good. But RESPECT is the key to any relationship and to it’s longivety.

The standard definition of respect holds but it is also an acronym:

Religious presence and compatibility
Expectations – reviewing and keeping real
Specify your needs, your desires, your expectations and your no no’s
Perform – work your plan and work this acronym every day
Emotions – watch and manage with respect for one another
Communication – during the day every day (talking and listening!)
Trust – the key to any successful relation

Each of these has a lot of work behind them – a lot of knowledge to achieve a long lasting relationship. And it is worth every single minute spent working it and enjoying it.

I wish you the very best that God has in store for you.

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