7 Signs You’re More Confident Than You Think

If you had asked me in my twenties if I was confident, I would have laughed (quietly, in my head, so no one noticed). I thought self-confidence meant never feeling nervous, never second-guessing yourself, and certainly never having that Sunday-night dread before Monday rolled around.

Turns out, I was wrong.

Self-confidence doesn’t always look like big speeches and fearless leaps. Most of the time, it’s much smaller, almost ordinary, which is why you might not recognize it in yourself. But it’s there, quietly holding you up.

Here are seven signs you might be more confident than you realise:

1. You make decisions without needing everyone else’s approval.
Even if you still like to talk things through, you’re learning to trust your own judgement. You have stopped needing a committee to confirm every choice.

2. You can say “no” without writing a five-paragraph explanation.
It might still feel awkward, but you are starting to value your time and energy enough to protect them.

3. You try things before you feel ready.
Maybe you sign up for a class you have been eyeing. Or you send that email you’ve been overthinking. You take action without waiting for perfect conditions.

4. You can admit when you’re wrong and move on.
Not with shame, but with the sense that mistakes are just part of learning. You don’t crumble every time you get something wrong.

5. You stand up for yourself (even if your voice shakes).
It might be in small ways, e.g. asking for clarity, correcting a mistake, or letting someone know how you prefer to be treated.

6. You are comfortable with not being everyone’s cup of tea.
You’ve stopped trying to smooth every rough edge so you’ll fit in. Some people won’t “get” you — and that’s fine.

7. You notice your own progress.
Instead of obsessing over what’s left to fix, you can look back and see how far you’ve come.

Confidence isn’t always about how loudly you walk into a room. Sometimes, it’s how quietly you hold your ground. And if any of these sound familiar, you’re probably already more confident than you give yourself credit for.

Why It Matters
When you recognise your own confidence, you stop chasing the kind that doesn’t fit you. You stop thinking you need to become someone louder, brasher, or more “out there” to be valid. Quiet confidence is still confidence — and it’s often the kind that lasts. It helps you take risks that matter to you, not ones that impress other people. And it builds a foundation you can return to when life wobbles.

Your Next Step
For the next week, I want you to run a simple experiment:

Each day, jot down one small way you showed confidence in your daily life.

It could be speaking up in a meeting, wearing the outfit you actually liked instead of the “safe” one, asking for clarity, or simply deciding something without polling three friends first.

Don’t overthink it — even sending back an undercooked meal at a café counts.

By the end of the week, you’ll have seven quiet but powerful examples.

This exercise works because your brain is wired to notice what you focus on. The more you look for signs of your confidence, the easier it is to see them — and the more they’ll grow.

Why It Can Feel Hard to Notice Your Confidence
Part of the challenge is that most of us have been taught to see confidence as “obvious.” If you don’t feel fearless, you assume you’re not confident. But real life isn’t like that. Confidence is a practice, not a permanent mood. It shows up differently for everyone. Sometimes it’s steady and warm, not loud and sparkly — and that’s still valid.

Capture the Takeaway
Self-confidence isn’t about erasing nerves. It’s about trusting yourself enough to keep moving, even when you’re unsure. The signs are already there. You just have to start noticing them.